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Dear Dolores

Dear Dolores: He Asked Me To Dinner After Dumping Me

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Dear Dolores,

I’m a pretty, smart girl who’s gone through shattering, horrible, tragic heartbreak because of a man I absolutely adored. After I spent months getting to know him, then moving to the South Side trying to develop a relationship with him, he unceremoniously dumped me. I came to my senses, moved back to Paleto, and began a new career. My problem? He has been doing business in my part of town and has asked me to dinner.

I’ve thought endlessly about what I’m going to wear, revved up the diet and exercise, imagined all sorts of restaurants he might invite me to, but I (honestly!) don’t indulge any grand fantasy of him saying: “I was wrong. Marry me.” My question: Should I even bother spending an evening with this man? And if I end up seeing him, do I play it cool? Or should I be all sugar, like I normally am? I really want him to eat his heart out! Clearly I’ve lost all perspective. 

Slightly Over the Edge

Dear Edge,

As a fellow pretty, smart girl who has gone through shatting, horrible tragic heartbreak more than once, I can relate. When you say you haven’t indulged in this grand fantasy of this man coming to his senses and realizing you’re the one, I frankly don’t believe you. If you haven’t considered this, you wouldn’t be putting it into words. 

Let me tell you, this man has unceremoniously dumped you once. In his brain, this is an acceptable way to treat people, namely you, and he will do it again. Please do not fool yourself thinking he won’t. If you give him the chance to do it again, he will. As always, it is your choice to make, but it is also your grave to dig. 

To be honest and a little blue, dick is plentiful and low in value. Find someone that will treat you the way you deserve and give you the commitment that you want in a partner. If you want to meet up with him, do it knowing that he is probably just looking for a hook up because you are there and, at least in his mind, available. If you meet him for dinner, let him pay for it. Look your best and be as witty and amazing as I know you are. Then, when the evening is winding down, get into a car, blow him a kiss, and leave him on the curb.

Love, Dolores

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