Dear Dolores: We Broke Up And Now He’s Engaged

Dear Dolores,

A while ago, I met an adorable fellow at a bar. One thing led to another, and we ended up going home together that night. We saw each other off and on for several weeks, then he dumped me, saying I was too young for him. I’m 24. He’s 31. Six months later, he started dating a phony, obnoxious, downright dim-witted woman I work with. She was with me the night I met him! 

I had a hard time dealing with them being together, seeing as how he broke my heart, but I managed to function at work. Well, guess what, Dolores? That bitch got engaged to him! Now it’s impossible for me to pretend that they don’t exist as she is wagging her ring all over. I’m inconsolable! How can a woman like that get engaged, and someone like me—smart, funny, friendly, cute—be single? It’s unfair! So unjust! How do I deal?

— The Cast-Off

Dear Cast-Off,

There are a multitude of reasons that relationships don’t work out. It seems to me that the age difference, in this case, was more of an excuse on his part than anything. It sucks that your ex, if it ever got that far, is now engaged to this woman you do not respect. However, in your heart of hearts, do you really wish that he was yours or do you want to see this woman be miserable because you don’t like her?

It doesn’t seem to me that you miss him as much as it seems that you don’t want to see this woman be happy when you’re feeling blue. My advice to you is to ignore them as much as you can. Find a new job if that’s what it takes. Go out to the bars again and meet a new man. The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else.

— Love, Dolores 

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